SAHM and WAHM

Suburban Turmoil wrote about SAHMs and WAHMs (Stay At Home Moms and Work Away from Home Moms). Yes, I got sucked in to it. Her first post regarding SAHMs brought my dander up a bit but I just let it go. Today she has a new post about WAHMs which lead me to today's post here. My comments were far to lengthy to post in her comments area. It is difficult to reply to such a topic in just a few words. My response here will not reflect all the respect I have for SAHM and WAHMs as no parent's whole experience can be put down to just a few pages. If you want to skip the Momma Drama come back tomorrow. I have a few posts in the works but felt the need to put together this response today.

In the comments portion of the first Suburban Turmoil post regarding SAHMs someone commented that having two teens in the house should make it a little easier on Suburban Turmoil. "...they are there and can be handed a baby for a minute while you go to the bathroom or make dinner." Verses having "4 children under the age of 6" to deal with day in and day out. Suburban Turmoil took great offence to the comment. Personally I did not seen anything insulting in the other woman's comment as she and I have both had wonderful experiences having teenagers assist in the every day routines. Suburban Turmoil listed all of her reasons for why her teens are not little helpers and add to her daily work as a SAHM. They do clean their rooms and the only "help" she receives from them is babysitting if she pays them. To me it is unbelievable that girls this age could not help out around the house. I wanted to get out the virtual Reality Book and make them sit down for a good reading! Of course none of us know everything that goes on in anyone else's house. After reading how things are in her household and her request "I'd love to hear from some more working moms" I decided to respond.

I really do not get the "Mommy Wars". I do not believe SAHM nor WAHM have anything easy. All Mothers who love their children work hard, be it at the home or elsewhere. Each of us have the same goal resulting in turning our little babies in to healthy and happy well rounded adults. As many have stated before, each of us are in different situations with children who are as unique as snow flakes. No two are the same. No plan, no fix will work for all families or all children.

My eldest two were very emotional when they were little. By the time they were tweens the moodiness went away. My youngest was practicing for PMS from the time she was 3 years old until recently. I think she has perfected her PMS techniques and moving out of this phase. My difficult times were when my children were little. The teen years for ME were a breeze (knocking on wood) compared to the constant attention for every little thing when they were little. Having now said that I am sure to have some sort of nervous breakdown episode following some horrendous teenage behavior in the very near future.

My teens DO help around the house. I have given them household chores since they were big enough to stand on a step stool and reach the dirty dishes in the kitchen sink. Now they mow the lawn (Saturday), take out the trash (two days a week), do the laundry (Sat), clean all floors (Fri or Sat), their bathrooms (Sat) and baby-sit for free. They are responsible for picking up after themselves and keeping their rooms clean. I make the meals 90% of the time. I take care of the dog and they take care of the cats. I run the taxi service about 50% of the time due to my older two now have drivers licenses. Taxi service is dependent on the number of vehicles available, who needs to be where and when.

I provide for our needs and wants. My children know the difference between need and want. They appreciate the fact we have everything we need and a most of what we want. We consider ourselves very lucky in that respect. We are a family and we keep house. I am not their personal slave nor are they mine. They are learning to be responsible and will need to do these things for themselves when they are out on their own. It is unbelievable the number of teenagers and college students who do not know how to operate a washer and dryer. Sad but true, really not a laughing matter. Okay, I have laughed once or twice when over hearing a co-worker explain in detail the steps to operating the washing machine.

This has to be said before someone gets their panties in a bunch. I am not a perfect person or a perfect mother. My children are not perfect either. We are human. There have been times when the garbage was not at the curb when the truck came. The grass grew tall in the back of the yard which resulted in bunnies. These are rare occurrences but hey, life happens and no one is perfect.

I have been a SWAHM (Single Work Away from Home Mom) off and on (mostly on) for 19 years. I have raised my children to be polite, helpful, grateful and many other things. They did not come out of the womb this way. It took years to help them become the people they are today. Suburban Turmoil wrote this in her post asking for more input from the WAHMs but said this about SAHMs “the fact that raising our kids ourselves”. If she or anyone else says this face to face to a WAHM who is providing for her family they should make sure to be out of arms reach. Working mothers have that phrase thrown in their faces many times. I hope she did not mean that working mothers do not raise their own children. Yes, children of WAHMs spend time at daycare if they are infants or toddlers and Mom is at the “office”. How is that so different from a SAHMs child who is in school full time and running off to so many activities. The children are spending most of their time with teachers, coaches and other instructors from the sound of it. You cannot think WAHM are not also raising their own children. SAHM and WAHM both raise their own children. Was that statement along with “the hard work has a much greater payoff than receiving a fat check” put in her post as an attempt to ruffle the feathers of the WAHMs?

Yes I have teens now but I did all the chauffeuring duties when they were younger. Trying to fit everyone’s activities into one overall schedule. It is amazing how much you have to cram into one evening - homework, dinner, baths, reading, etc. I started cooking our meals on the weekends and freezing them for week day dinners (still do). I have been lucky enough to find a position which now allows me a 5 minute one way commute. I am so happy to put the one way 2 hour commutes behind me!

I have great respect for SAHM. I have said it time and time again, in person and blog after blog that I admire SAHM. I work because I have to but there were times when my eldest two were toddlers and I did the SAHM gig. At first it was absolutely thrilling! The first few weeks I was Donna Reed, Betty Crocker and Super Nanny all in one! By week 4 I was dragging. I started counting the days until I would return to the office. I hardly spent 20 minutes a day in a full upright standing position. Most of my day was spent near the floor, playing with them, cleaning up mess after mess, separating them, cleaning up mess after mess, preparing meals, more clean up required after each meal. Yes we had some great times too but I found it to be more difficult than my office. It takes a lot of consistent energy to stay at home. I enjoy coming home to a clean house and leaving my work at the office. Having the physical separation of work place and home gives me more time enjoying the company of my children and being Mommy.

The down side of being a WAHM

Separation anxiety from your child is something most of us go through. (You do not need to be a WAHM for this to happen. The children of SAHMs go for visits with relatives or off to summer camps, etc.) I was very fortunate to have my mother as the person looking after each my children until they reached school age. At first I did not want my children in daycare but that soon changed when I became the sole bread winner. My real anxiety came when my son started school. Correction, it was not anxiety it was anger and jealousy that over took me. The thought of the teacher, who was a complete stranger to us, not someone I had the option of picking out personally, was able to spend hours and hours with my son…and I. had. to. work.

As a SWAHM I am on 24/7. I am the one who stays up all night with my children when they are sick. If they are not well enough for school I take a sick day from the office. I am the one and only one who makes sure the other children are taken to school and everything else flows like it should.If they feel “all better” and rested in the morning they are off to school. Tired, worn out Mommy is off to work with no chance at a nap later in the day. There were some mornings I arrived at work after a two hour commute and swore Scotty from Star Trek beamed me there. Having no recollection of the drive in to work. I was on auto pilot and amazed I arrived in one piece without incident.

I get the guilt of “you’re the only mommy who doesn't come” to the __________ school function. I do make it to ALL of the after work hours functions and to a few of the during work hours functions. I am happy to bake a bazillion cup cakes for any fundraiser. Teachers, other faculty and the SAHMs from my daughter’s new school are all amazed that I cannot just drop everything and rush over to the school for every single event. They are equally disgusted to hear me say I cannot take off work one day every week to volunteer in the classroom. I feel the need to wear a large sandwich board sign that says “I AM A SWAHM. I WORK FOR MONEY. I WORK TO PROVIDE FOR MY FAMILY” Even if I wore such a sign they would over look it and still give me those disapproving “looks” and little lectures. I gave up repeating the reason for my lack of attendance after only one month. Bring on the looks. It wont change a thing.

At previous companies I had issues with taking the day off due to a sick child or even when I had a really awful string of the flu. If I came in to the office sick everyone said "Why did you come in?! You are going to get the rest of us sick!" or "That child is going to make us all sick!" If I didn't come in they would say "We need you here! You cannot possibly be that ill" and "Why not leave the sick brat with the daycare, school or your next door neighbor?"

The worst of all was a woman supervisor who said she would only give me 2 weeks maternity leave. Being the bread winner of our little family at the time I tried to fight this with the help of an HR representative who just happened to be pregnant herself. There were 8 of us total who were all working at the company and pregnant. I received the call about a week prior to my due date from my OBGYN saying "Tell your boss today is your last day before your maternity leave. Results from your sonogram are in and we need to do a C-Section tomorrow." I called the HR department only to find out the pregnant woman who was working with me was FIRED! I returned to work 2 weeks after giving birth. I was fired 2 weeks later for being 2 minutes late (traffic) and not calling in. How would I have known I would be 2 mins late?. During my rushed "grab a box for your things" and lets talk about how quick you can get out of here, my single female, child hating boss (not the one I originally started out with) stated her disgust for my using a breast pump in the women's bathroom. In retrospect I am so grateful to be away from that woman and I found a more promising career.

My sick leave is now devoted mostly to sick days for my children and dyer sick days for myself. If I am able to drive I go to work. If anyone says why are you here when you are sick I will just let it roll off my back. In my line of work I am the best at what I do. My boss has a very difficult day if I am not there to answer questions or help him out in person. There seems to be an unspoken rule at this new place. If you are not at work you will not be bothered with any type of phone call from the office. Any sick leave I have left over at the end of the year rolls over to the next year and is added to vacation time...time I would like to spend with my children.

On the other side I have people who instantly feel sorry for me when they find out I am a Single Mom. Ouch! I have been doing this for a long time. I have the hang of it. We live in a nice house, a good neighborhood, I have a great job and we are doing just fine. Please do not give me those great big sad puppy dog eyes. Just because I am single does not mean it is the end of the world. I really do appreciate the neighbors who offer to do physical things I am not strong enough for such as making those darn lug nuts on the flat tire move or helping me with the couch I thought I could move all by myself and got it stuck in the front door. I did manage to get the couch off the roof of the car, over the porch railing and into the front door. he.he.he. I literally did a little happy "touch down style" dance on the front porch when I accomplished that much. However, I ruined the couch by attempting to do the rest all by myself. Okay not totally ruined, just one corner on the bottom front of the coach. Ugh. Maybe this last paragraph is sort of like what Suburban Turmoil meant when she said "Being a stay-at-home mom...is not that hard." Whether you are a SAHM or WAHM - If you have the routine down and are really in sync with all that needs to be done on a daily basis then maybe it isn't that hard for "you" and Me. Remember once you say it is all okay life has a funny way of throwing you a curve ball.


After Suburban Turmoil accepted the apology of the Mom who said it should be a little easier having teens around Suburban Turmoil took another hard stab at her. This other mom is a long time supporter and commenter on Suburban Turmoil. With all said and done by Suburban Turmoil maybe her teen step-daughters are really as awful as she says. Geesh, her harsh words make it sound like every teenager is bad. From Suburban Turmoil :

“...let me tell you, you have got a real treat in store for you in eight to ten years! When you find yourself reminiscing about the good old days when they were small, I promise I won't be snickering off in the distance somewhere.”

No, she wont be snickering. Suburban Turmoil admitted she will be dealing with the teenage years of her youngest daughter and her son "own children".

Summer Break is Coming

Next week Snow White will graduate from her current grade. There is to be a ceremony and everything. It seems there is a graduation ceremony for every grade in the city. When my older two were going through the school system there were only two graduations, Kindergarten and High School. I hope to postpone an international meeting to the next day just so I can attend the graduation ceremony. My boss thinks it a tad crazy but come on. School will be closed for 3 months and I wont have to ask off to attend any school functions.

I remember the first day of summer when I was Snow White’s age. School was out! Mom made us a really big breakfast. After we ate she showed us around the kitchen as if we had never seen it before. This is what she said to all four of us…

This is the refrigerator. It is here to keep food and drinks cold. This is not an alternate air conditioner. Do not stand in front of it with the door hanging wide open. Think of what you want and then open the door. There will always be a full pitcher of Kool-Aid in here for you.(very diluted, barely any sugar)

This is the bread box. Open it up and wal-la there is bread. Take two slices of bread and put it on the counter. Over here is a cabinet. Open it up and there is peanut butter (we had flavored peanut butters - chocolate, banana, regular). In the refrigerator is a jar of jelly. Spread the peanut butter on one piece of bread and spread the jelly on the other piece of bread. Put them together like so and you have a snack. This can also be lunch. If you make a mess in the kitchen you clean it up. Put the peanut butter, jelly, and Kool-Aid back where it belongs. Rinse out your glass and put it on the counter before you leave the kitchen. You will use the same glass all day. I want you to have as much fun as possible during the summer, but do not want to make extra work for me.

It seemed every time I saw my mother during the summer she was washing clothes, sweeping floors, on her knees scrubbing floors, hanging clothes out to dry, cooking dinner, etc. The only times I remember her sitting was at her sewing machine making clothes for us, at the dinning room table going over the bills or sitting for a moment or two together during dinner. Year round she would pop up and down from the dinner table to get this or that. I don’t think my mother sat down for more than 5% of my whole childhood. Sheesh! I sure feel for all the SAHMs.

My summer gallivanting consisted of riding bikes all over the neighborhood with my brothers and friends. All four of us would play games with all the kids in the neighborhood. We had bike races, played Cowboys & Indians, freeze tag, hide & seek, raced flowers or clovers in a little stream. My friends and I played with our Barbies OUTSIDE. That’s right, we were allowed to play with them in the back yard, the grass, the dirt and on the driveway. We would run out of the house yelling “Mom! We’re going to Edna & Kelly’s!” and she would respond “Be back by dark!”

When we played at a friends house we played outside. Going inside during the summer meant we were thirsty, it was time to eat or the dreaded “Why do I have to come in now? It’s not really all that dark. Johnny doesn’t have to go in yet.” Everyone knows what followed that statement “I’m not Johnny’s Mother. I am your Mother.”



If by chance one sibling did not arrive home at dark Mom would walk the rest of us around the neighborhood looking at each yard for the missing siblings bike. Your bike in a neighbors yard was always the tell tale sign of your where abouts. We never left the house without our bikes during the summers. One way of getting all the children in doors was the "Mosquito Man”!



Every other evening around dusk the Mosquito Man would drive his truck up and down the streets of our neighborhood with bug spray shooting out the back. I recall many of us riding our bikes about a block away from home. Suddenly you could hear other kids screaming! We all stopped our bikes and listened intently. All of a sudden, the screaming...stopped. We would then hear a familiar but scary swooshing noise. Then.....RUN!! Oh No! It’s the...the.. MOSQUITO MAN!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! We would pedal as fast as our little legs would go! Trying not to breath! All the way home! Throw down our bikes in the middle of the yard and burst through the front door gasping for breath.

Thinking back on Mosquito Man and the fact this was in the mid 1970s, makes me wonder what was in that spray? How could they spray chemicals in the air around little children? If I seem a little “odd” from time to time I am going to blame it on the Mosquito Man. Yeah, um, that’s it.

Surprise!!

The Monday before Labor Day weekend I some how caught a metal splinter in my eye. I was rushed around to different doctors during the course of the day. I still do not understand how it was possible to walk through the shop to the bathroom with those huge safety goggles on and still catch a metal splinter in my eye. Anyway, the rains came and the lawn grew and grew. I could not mow the lawn. ManSon was off visiting friends and the Lawn Man was busy. Short story the grass in our back yard grew tall.

After the eye patch was off I decided the exercise would be good for me so I tackled the job of mowing the lawn myself. This was Friday evening. We had company coming...Snow White's Play Date and Grammy K. Yeah! The back yard would look so nice. Snow White, Gymnast and Pup were in the back yard a good deal of the time.

The next day, Sunday, we went to Gymnast's church. A bit different than we are use to, laying of hands, no one sings the Amen part of the hymn, and a few small things. It was really nice that Gymnast's Dad waited outside for us to arrive as we were late. I drove right past the church twice before actually making it into the drive way. It was nice that Snow White had a friend in the Sunday School class and in Jr. Church. I was so happy to meet Gymnast's little brother. He has MS or CP and looks just too adorable! Yes, he will be 7 soon but he looked so cute I just wanted to scoop him up in my lap and hold him. I resisted the temptation. He is almost 7 after all. I went up with him and the family for the laying of the hands and prayers for his recovery of strep throat.

Snow White was invited to say after church for the youth group pizza and a movie. I agreed due to the pleas from Snow White and Gymnast. It felt odd going home alone and even odder being at home alone. I could not stand the quiet. The hours passed by like centuries. I arrived about 15 minutes early and off we went home.

Memorial Day, while chatting with my sister on the phone I heard Pup barking up a storm in the back yard. I went out to investigate what I thought might be a large bee. One and a half inches from the top of the grass was the head...many tiny heads...little baby bunnies!!

So tiny

I took Pup up the stairs and sat him in the sunroom. I then went back to see if what I thought I saw was actually real. Yes, there was a very shallow burrow of baby bunnies. At first I thought I could cover them up with Snow White's wagon to keep them from Pup and still allow a little way in for Momma Bunny. I went inside and Pup went out in the back with Snow White. She was thrilled about the baby bunnies! Moments later there was a gut curdling scream! Snow White burst through the basement door crying and screaming incoherently. I ran out to the back yard, scooped up Pup and Snow White started shrieking "He killed it! He killed that baby bunny!"

What?! No Way! No! Not in front of Snow White! This couldn't be happening!

She pointed at the wagon and I slowly lifted it up. To my ever so grateful eyes all bunnies were fine. I showed Snow White and she explained Pup was trying to get the bunnies but she did not actually see a bunny in his mouth. Whew! Thank goodness!

The bunnies have me in a real spot. I cannot allow Pup free rein in the back yard until they are grown and out of here. (neighbors say it will be about 2 wks). If I let Pup have a free run in the back yard Snow White might actually witness a bunny killing. I cannot just scoop them up and move them because Momma Bunny wont have anything more to do with them if I touch them. My consciences tells me I cannot deprive them of their mother. That would be killing them. Snow White knows the rule "if you touch a wild animals baby such as a baby bird it's mother will not take care of it. It's ok if you think I am soft hearted or weak. I just cannot do it.

Eyes almost opened

Now Pup is restricted to doing his business during walks and puppy pads on the deck, the screened in porch and in the sunroom. Snow White refuses to go in to the back yard for fear of scaring off Momma Bunny unless she is out there to view the bunnies with me. Other than viewing the baby bunnies we have all staid out of the back yard. Here are a couple of pictures I took of them today...





They are so cute I wanted to pick them up and pet their baby soft fur. I resisted the temptation. I also reminded Snow White we are not to touch them no matter how cute. They are wild animals and must stay that way. New House Rule...Nothing new that can poop is allowed in the house. We have enough responsibilities with the 2 cats (separate litter boxes) and the Pup.

********* BUNNY UPDATE ***********

June 7, 2007 - It was a half day at school for Snow White today. I picked her up and took her home to ManSon during my lunch hour.

ManSon: "By the way, the bunnies are gone."
Me: "No way! They cannot possibly be old enough to leave."

I ran out to the back yard and sure enough the bunny burrow was empty. Completly, empty. At first a sad sinking feeling came over me. I was going to miss those little bunnies. On the other hand YEAH! I have my back yard back! I can let Pup romp around out there! Snow White was very sad at first. Then I said "How could they just up and leave without even saying goodbye? Especially after taking over our whole back yard and everything?!" Snow White laughted and said "Silly Mommy, you know bunnies cannot talk." She smiled and all was right in the world again.

Brighten Up Your Day With A New Purse!

Just in case you missed out on the last contest for a Donney & Bourke purse check this out. Pinks & Blues is giving everyone another chance! Tell her I said your name should be entered twice just because you are so special. Now get over there and put your name in the drawing!

Contest ends June 11th

Good Luck!!

Crafty Day

Monday, Memorial Day,

(will write about Sunday later…power outage lost file)

Since we are away from relatives, over coming my fears of actually having a car payment rather than paying cash and basically doing Memorial Day weekend on our own we dive into to crafts. ManSon and Oldest Daughter are off with friends. Snow White and I brave the shopping strips expecting them to be closed due to the holiday. To our surprise all stores are open! We rush into AC More and fill up our cart with much needed items to create a wonderful end of year thank you gift from Snow White to her teacher. A gift card to the local Olive Garden would have sufficed but a crafty gift from the heart seems more personal. I thought the projects would take up most of the day but turns out Snow White has become a wiz at crafts. Quick drying paint was also a culprit in her finishing so quickly.

First on Snow White’s agenda… the Box. She picked out a good sized hinged box. I picked out a clay flower pot. We made our way through the isles picking out things she liked such as stickers of puppies and flowers and other miscellaneous things from the scrap booking sections. Then we made our way to the paint area. I asked Snow White what she wanted to make of the box and flower pot. The flower pot would be for flowers on teacher’s desk and the box would be for whatnots she has no drawers for. Still the paint selections were a bit fuzzy to me at the time but I knew they would make a nice addition to our craft paint selection at home. One final item was a turtle she saw hanging on to a pottery planter.

After our little crafters extrusion we decided to go out for dinner. Snow White requested a restaurant we had seen on our way to the craft store, Cheese Burger in Paradise. We have a few rules for dining out. You should pick a restaurant you have not tried and a dish you never had before. Apparently she loves gumbo and Cheese Burger in Paradise. She could not stop saying the word paradise. This place looks like paradise, the food is like a tropical island of paradise, Madagascar movie Paradise was reveled when the lion liked sushi and it was under an umbrella just like this! Look at my fruit! Paradise fruit! This is paradise! Our table of the ocean and land is paradise.

When we were home we laid out all of our new supplies. I am very proud of her creativity. I have to say even as an adult there were moments I thought “Wait! Let Mommy help you!” but she had more confidence in herself than I had realized. I let her do her own thing and then waited on the side lines to fix it. I came to the realization, she knows what she wants to do and she can achieve it! She did let me pain the flower pot and put the flower stems in. That was all. One thing I really wanted to do was paint over the blue drip on the front of the box. Okay, maybe you have to look hard to see it…bottom corner of the box. She would not let me. They are her projects and I no choice but to let her do them as she likes. She is 8 years old after all.

Garden of Knowlege

Teacher's Box


Since Snow White was afraid her precious gifts would be distroyed on the school bus I brought them to her class during my lunch hour. The teacher was thrilled! After all the students had a chance to see them up close she put the flowers on her desk and took the box home to use as a jewelry box.

Memorial Day Weekend - Saturday

Saturday 5/26/07

Today is a big day for Snow White. Thursday at the Author’s Tea we invited Gymnast to come over Saturday afternoon to play. Grammy K called Thursday night to say she would like to visit Saturday morning. Snow White was so excited about her visitors she could barely sleep Friday night.

Saturday morning came. I woke up, fed the cats, let the dog out and took my shower. I let the dog back in and he went right to Snow White’s bed to wake her up. She was a little groggy from lack of sleep [too excited to sleep the night before] but became wide awake when reminded about her visitors. While she dressed I tidied up her room then chopped fruit, veggies and cheese for snacks.

Snow White came out of the bathroom dressed from head to toe in pink. Her hair curled made little ringlets around her face and all over. Too keep all of the ringlets I brushed through her hair with just my fingers. To top her off I made a small pony tail with her hair at the top of her head. Just enough to keep the hair out of her eyes. Then she looked through the hair accessory drawer in the bathroom and found a pink bow for her pony tail which I gladly put into place.

We were ready for Grammy K. Hours went by and soon it would be noon. No word from Grammy K so we started to worry. I tried to keep Snow White busy to keep her mind off her worry. After awhile she went out in the back yard to play with Pup.

While keeping a watchful eye on the window I noticed a car drive by. The car slowed down then passed our house. I thought since it was Grammy K’s first visit to our new house she might be a little lost or could not see the house number. I ran out front to look down the street and wave to her. The car turned around and headed back. To my surprise it wasn’t Grammy K it was Gymnast and her Mom Dawn! I never thought about it before but Dawn looks a bit like Grammy K. By the way, Grammy K looks pretty young.

As they drove up our drive way Gymnast was already unbuckling her seatbelt. She was so excited about coming over to play she could hardly wait to get out of the car. Dawn started asking questions but Gymnast didn’t notice and shut the car door. Dawn rolled down the window and we both laughed at how excited both girls were about the play date. Is it still called a play date when they are 8 and 9 years old? Anyway, Dawn wanted to know when to pick her up. I told her we were going to play it by ear but I was thinking more along the lines of dinner time instead of just an hour or so. She told me Gymnast had a difficult time sleeping due to the excitement of pending play date. I told her we had the same situation at our house last night.

Dawn said she was a little relived about the length of the visit since her son, Ray, was not feeling well. Ray has MS and some form of retardation, on top of that today he had a fever. I hate using that word, retardation, but I do not know the correct name. I used it here since it is the word his mother used when talking about an appointment for him. I can only imagine the daily parental duties of a child with disabilities. Taking care of an ill child is exhausting enough. Adding this on top of their regular routine would really take the wind right out of me. God bless them for their strength, endurance and especially their love.

Gymnast and I headed into the house via the front door and to my surprise Snow White was in the living room. She did not notice Gymnast was right out front with me. I did not call her in from the back yard since I did not want to get her hopes up if the passing car was not one of her guests. Snow White and Gymnast hugged each other while gleefully jumping up and down! Once they calmed down they headed out to the back yard to play. A few minutes later they came back in to cool off. I asked Gymnast if she had lunch yet? She had not so I suggested pizza and both girls quickly agreed that pizza would be GREAT! They went to play Barbie’s in Snow White’s room while I made the pizza.

Shortly after I placed the pizza in the oven I thought of calling Grammy K’s house to see if something came up. At least I would know she was not lost somewhere between the two states. Just then an SUV pulled up into our drive way. It was Grammy K!! My first thought was to rush out to greet her but this time I alerted Snow White. She ran to the front door and I scooped up Pup to keep him from rushing out. I really did not want Grammy K's arrival to be a race after Pup.

We had not seen Grammy K since the Three Little Pigs play at the dinner theater last year with PawPaw. Snow White hugged her and introduced her friend. Grammy K gave Snow White her birthday present in a gift bag. Snow White was tickled pink with what she found in the bag! It was outfits for her Kirsten American Girl doll. Snow White knew exactly what the outfits were based on the Kirsten books she has read. She really loved the straw hat and put it on her head “This is so cute! I want to wear it!” We all giggled at the sight of the tiny hat on Snow White’s head.

Since this was Grammy K’s first visit to our new house she asked for the grand tour. First stop was Snow White’s room. Grammy K thought the pink furniture looked very cute. I explained the school house desk was bought by my parents at an auction when I was in 2nd grade in it’s original stained wood and gray metal. Over the years of my childhood the metal had always been painted white while the wood was painted blue, red and then green. I repainted the white portions white and painted the wood portions pink when I painted the shelves and other accessories in Snow White’s room before her slumber party. I still need to paint the dresser but that will be a project for another day, after I buy a sander or something to strip all the old layers of paint. Grammy K was reminiscing about the dresser. It is a very old nursery wardrobe I picked up at a sale when I was pregnant with Snow White. It has four drawers and a little closet on the side. The hanging bar in the closet slides out for easy access. Grammy K was happily surprised to see the wardrobe as she remembered having a similar one when she was little. Snow White is older so we use the closet side for her American Girl doll clothes and some of her dress up accessories (hats, boas, scarves).

We showed her the doll house Snow White and I built together. I made sure to mention Snow White picked out the carpets, paints and wallpaper herself. Snow White showed her the planters pots she painted and the plants she made to fit in them as well as the furniture, dishes and pictures she made for the doll house.

We showed her Snow White’s bathroom with the pink tile walls and beautiful white porcelain fixtures. I told her how excited Snow White was to have such a beautiful bathroom but was perplexed by the toilet. The lever for the toilet is not one you push down on which is the norm for so many. It is a dangling porcelain tear drop at the side which you can either push back or pull towards you. She quickly got the hang of it but we always have to tell our guests or they would have the same issue.

Then it was on to the kitchen. Grammy K remarked on the large size and cabinet space. It is a good sized eat-in kitchen. Not as large as the one in our old brown house but larger than the one in our last house. I showed her my favorite cabinet, the pots and pans! It is a bottom corner cabinet where the door folds out in two sections. I can store all of my pots and pans in this cabinet without stacking them up! The only way to make this a better cabinet is to have it lazy Susan style like my Grandmother’s. We actually have more cabinets than I know what to do with but that is a good thing. I explained the gas stove and oven is a new thing for me. I am still getting accustomed to the open flame and it does cook a bit differently than the electric appliance I have used in the past. She loved the fixtures and the deep sinks.


(just like Kentucky Girl’s but has two large deep sinks). It was day time so I didn’t think to show her lights the under cabinet with a dimmer switch to boot.

On to the dinning room. Nothing much in here right now other than the table, chairs, antique sewing machine cabinet (with gold working Royal sewing machine) I use as an accent table/small buffet table/lamp table and yes, the antique vanity minus the mirror (stored in my closet) with the computer on it. We do use the dinning room for all meals and homework time. I can type and while she does her homework and she can look at the child websites while I work on a project at the table or cook.
The dinning room also has a large closet with two upper shelves. I store all my cleaning equipment, mop, brooms, vacuum, rug cleaning machine, paper towels, puppet theater (I made out of PCV piping and satin), party supplies, future gifts, etc. We also showed her the pageant closet in the hall and her latest glitz pageant dress.

Since Grammy K was about to have hip surgery I did not do my best to clean up the basement or my older children’s room. I did not think she was up for the stairs but she was so off we went up stairs. ManSon’s room had many empty cans of soda and an unmade bed. He is 19 years old so I do not check on his room often. Anyway she is a mother with boys so she was understanding. She also saw the room was as large as combining the living room, Snow White’s room, her bathroom and that whole side of the house. I point out the “Hobbit doors” on either side of the room. These are storage areas that run the length of the house. This, in our view, is a cute characteristic of the room and the house.

She wanted to see Oldest Daughter’s room too as it was part of the tour but I explained she is gone for long periods of time and locks her room. I do have a key but I wanted to respect her wishes of privacy especially when it was a house tour. Oldest Daughter’s room is the size of the kitchen and dinning room. Do not worry, I do check on her room from time to time when she is here and when she is not. There isn’t much in there other than her bed, dresser, posters she made of her and her friend. Some of Snow White’s toys are in her closet and that is the reason for her not wanting to use the closet. Actually, it is an old doll of mine that freaks her out. My Chrissy doll scares the poop out of her! Chrissy looks like a large baby, has long eye lashes, black eyes with no pupils and has a pony tail that grows when you pull it and a string at her back to make the pony tail shorter. It is her pupil less eyes that freaks out Oldest Daughter. I need to find a new place for Chrissy to reside.

Instead of showing her Oldest Daughter’s room I show her the large linen closet in between the two upstairs bedrooms. Then it is on to the basement. Ugh, I have too many projects in progress down there but she wanted to see the house. I also wanted her to see the largeness of the house. By now the girls had gone to the basement to play Hey You Peakacheu.

She glanced around the room and then it was time to see my room. There was chewed up tissue paper on my floor due to Pups facination with paper chewing and then I showed her my large master bathroom with all the beautiful fixtures. My bedroom is a bit small for a master bedroom but the only thing I do in here is sleep and store my clothes. The master bedroom has my queen size bed, my large antique dresser, a large trunk and room for another dresser and night stands. It also has a large closet with lights. I have seen larger master bedrooms in the other houses I viewed before deciding on this house. In the houses with the large master bedrooms the other bedrooms were very small, too small for my taste. So small you might get a twin bed and small dresser in but nothing else. I have children who have things of their own such as toys, art they like to display, miscellaneous things and full size beds. I would much rather the space went to their rooms than the master bedroom.

On to the laundry and storage room. This room runs the span of the house! There are large shelves and a walk out to the screened in porch which walks out to the deck. I can store more in this laundry room than I could in an attic and garage! We do have a small shed and a closed in cinderblock room under the sunroom.

The pizza was ready so the girls ran up to get their plates and took them back down stairs with them. Grammy K had some pizza too. We then went to the living room to chat for awhile. I laid out the snack trays in the living room. Grammy K and I talked of all the things that have gone on in our lives over the past year. We talked about her up coming surgery, my work and Snow White. She was surprised to hear my desire to put more focus on Snow White’s other activities and retire Snow White from pageants. Of course Snow White has other ideas. Anytime I bring up the topic of quiting pageants she says “I want to do pageants until I am at least 16 years old. We cannot stop yet. I’m not done yet.”

Pageants are something she really enjoys but I am growing tired of my part as a pageant mom. The days of preparation, packing the suitcases, making sure we have every little thing we might need during the weekend (you cannot buy what we need at the local stores or gift shop), hours spent altering outfits that do not fit as they should when we receive them, traveling to see the coach, paying for coaching lessons and the coach cannot travel due to lack of hours booked (I understand she cannot travel for free) and after hours of travel dealing with grouchy staff of hotels that are not prepared for a large number of guests. Not to mention all the running around we do at the hotel for coaching lessons, running back and forth to our room for changes and fitting in time for the pool. Oh I love pool time! That is when the weekend tones down and it is finally time to relax. Snow White loves all the rushing about and getting ready for the stage, being on the stage, the primping, practicing and especially her time on stage. I get through it thinking of her joy and pool time! That is the only time during the weekend that I can get my breath back. You may ask why I do all of this? My daughter has found an activity she loves doing and I am her Mom. I back her up in something she enjoys, grows and excels in. I will continue but I am hoping she feels the same about local pageants rather than Nationals. I just want to have some of my weekends to relax and enjoy. I know, I am her mother and I should keep going with this joy she has but maybe it does not have to be the large scale she has become accustomed. Baseball, Soccer and Moms of children in any sport or activity our children are involved...you know we all need a break now and then.

After we discuss the pageant thing it was on to family issues. Who is where and doing what. Then on to the bit awkward subject of my X. I explain that yes, Snow White has asked about him from time to time but not often. I only tell Snow White he is a soldier and off making the world a safer place. Sorry, she is just too young to hear all that went on. I believe every child thinks they will inherently be part of what their mother and father as their own personality. They believe they will be like their parents in many ways. I do not want her to see her father as anything other than a good person. Yes, he is a soldier. This will help her set her foundation, her childhood. When she is old enough and has a better relationship with her father she can come to her own conclusions but for now she just needs to know she has good on both sides of her family.

Grammy K and I never really had the time to sit down together since the split to discuss what I was telling Snow White about her father. She seemed very relieved and happy about my choices.

As Grammy K and I were near the end of our visit we heard the girls playing Barbie’s again in Snow White’s room. Apparently Aladdin and Jasmine were attempting a trip together but there were complications in planning this trip. Aladdin was the only one with a license to drive and Jasmine was not old enough to get a license. Snow White also said Jasmine was a teenager. Gymnast said teenagers did not have babies. Snow White giggled and said “On Reba there was teenagers and they had a baby.” Okay! Time to stop watching Reba. They make it look too easy in the eyes of an 8 year old to have a baby when you are a teenager! Maybe I should keep watching it and tell her all the ways it is hard on them? I don’t know yet but for now Reba is rated PG13 in our house.

They were arguing over who would drive the Barbie RV and who would fly in the plane.

Aladdin (Snow White) said that he took on most of the care of the baby.

Jasmine (Gymnast) said she was his mother and could take care of him pretty good.

Aladdin: I think you should take more responsibility and recognize I can get him there safely.

Jasmine: Well, I can take him on the plane but it would be less difficult if you took him in the car.

Aladdin: Yes, it would be safer in the car but you need to be more of a parent. You need to take care of your responsibility. You know how long it takes to make a baby.

Jasmine: Well it only takes a week to make a baby. You take him for a drive.


When Grammy K said it was time for her to go Snow White and I hugged Grammy K tightly and thought of plans to visit her at her house this summer. I explained Snow White’s summer day care is closed the first week of July and thus my vacation would be timed around.

The day went on with the girl playing in the back yard and Snow White’s room. After awhile they decided to make plays with the American Girl Play program on the computer. You select an American Girl, the setting and props. Then you work out her motions on screen, her facial expressions and you create her dialog. This lasted about an hour. They giggled and laughed through out the process. Then I suggested a movie. We watched ‘Aragon’, ate popcorn and drank apple juice. After the movie the girls wanted to play Hey You Pikacheu again.

I went to let the dog out . As I passed by the answering machine I saw a new message. It was Dawn asking when she should pick up Gymnast. I had not realized it was dinner time already. I called her back to let her know everything was fine. I am surprised none of us heard the phone ring. I explained the girls were playing so well together and not showing any signs they were ready for their time together to end. I asked if Gymnast could stay for dinner with us and play a bit more on the game before going home. Dawn asked about what time and I suggested 8 pm which was fine by her.

Gymnast and Snow White were ecstatic about having dinner together! I gave them the choice of smoke sausage, hamburgers, turkey sandwiches, paninis or Chinese and they chose Chinese. I made Shrimp and Chicken fried rice then laid it out on the table in two plates. I told he girls they could each choose one or try both. They opted to try both and had half a plate of each. While they ate they furrowed through the rice and veggies for the chicken and shrimp. Once they found every piece of Chicken and Shrimp they went outside to play with Pup each leaving a plate of rice and veggies. Ugh.

A few hours later we walked over to Gymnasts house, Snow White, Gymnast, Pup and I. We met Gymnast's gunie pig and I chatted for about an hour with the parents on thier front lawn. Next thing we knew the girls were planning an outting for the next day. Church with the neighbors and an after school...um after Sunday School event.

Oh a Catholic church?

No, we are not Catholic.

Religion just hung there in the air ...




We can pick you up and take you to our church.

That wont be necessarry. I know where the chuch is.

We can follow you or you can follow us.

Thank you for thinking of us but we will get there.

My poor puppy, he just wants to be on the move. Snow White it is time to go.

We had to go. We had to go to church with them. We were invited and it was known we had no set plans. It would be a good exercise in other peoples beliefs. This usually becomes a run for the home porch. "Nice to see you. I wish you well. Thank you for walking me home." The girls treated it like a school outting. "See you tomorrow!"

A Working Mother's Guilt

Wednesday night we gear up for Author's Tea at school. The teacher requested all students dress up like they were going to have tea. Snow White laid out her pink skirt with embroidered flowers, a long sleeved, pink poet/pirate sort of blouse, a pink straw hat, her white gloves and white sandals. Yes, I said sandals! For this one special occasion at school she was allowed to wear sandals.

Thursday guilt of a single working mom came up. Snow White in her early morning pleading "Please come to the Author's Tea today. You are the only parent who never comes to things we do during school time." I do attend all the after 5 PM activities. I present my work to date to my boss by 10 AM and then ask if there is anything pressing for the afternoon. He assures me nothing is pressing but asks the time of the Author's Tea. Sorry, it is not within the three-quarters of full filling the salary requirement. Um what? He explained if the activity was after 3 PM I could go and not show time out of the office. Since the Author's Tea was at 2 PM I would have to take a half day and he approved my time off on the spot! YEAH! Snow White would be so happy to see me! Especially since she thought I was not coming. {guilt of working moms post will eventually come}

My gosh Snow White was right! The teacher was so ecstatic about my arrival you would have thought I was the Pope! The teacher thanked me over and over again for giving Snow White all she needed for the Tea. "When she entered the school another teacher said "Oh my! She is too cute! Looks like she is entertaining at High Tea with the Queen." To that the teacher said "Exactly! She is going to Tea today."

I am usually the ONLY Mom not in attendance at these functions held during the normal 9-5 work hours. Yes, she attends a school where all the Moms are stay at home moms or work only when their children are in school with a flexible enough schedule to be at school at least 25% of the day. All very intelligent women AND they volunteer EVERYWHERE in the community. They are all members of this and that of the holy grail sort of charities and they take time out of their busy schedules to do the ever so loving classroom appearances [yes, I am jealous of this]. Every last one of them. "Which groups do you attend? I can get you in our exclusive group of _______ or ________ and even ______! I think I saw you at our regular ____ weekly meeting. How long have you been here? Oh. You work?" Then they try to politely make conversation. What else can they do? You..I mean Me, the working Mom, have nothing in common with them after all [so they may think]. I do try to bridge the gap. I am not terribly shy. These are the times I wish I was a stay at home Mom but as a single Mom I cannot be at both places at once and still maintain the income we need as a family [college for all three children and everyday living expenses]

Snow White and her class was just coming in from second recess. Her eyes lit up and she looked as if she had stopped breathing! Her teacher stopped the procession line of students long enough for me to make my way from the sign in sheet [after the entrance camera and all security clearances] to the classroom. The teacher thanked me over and over again for coming. It was a bit of a shock to Snow White that I came to the school. Apparently it was also a big deal for the teacher that I arrived during normal school hours. One little girl, Egypt, pulled on my suit jacket and said Snow White looks so cute today. I said to Egypt, "Darling, you look so cute in your skirt and top. I love the bead work in your skirt and the sparkle in your smile." Her smile flourished even more after I said it. So did mine!

I thought the Author's Tea was similar to the reading and signing of a famous children's book author who had visited before. This was not the case. The authors we parents were there to celebrate were our children. It was very thrilling to watch Snow White and her classmates recite poems, sing songs and read books they wrote themselves.

At the Author's Tea I did see all of the local Moms from the Slumber party. My thought was the first Mom I could get next to I would invite her daughter over to play on Saturday. After meeting all the Moms and the girls at the slumber party it was like shooting fish in a barrel. It turned out to be Gymnast's Mom.

Running a very close second was American Girl's Mom. She hung around like she wanted to talk with me. There was not enough time to talk with one Mom and the teacher before the end of day school bell rung. I did try to rush through the sign out process to also talk with American Girl's Mom. When Snow White and I reached the parking lot there was no sign of American Girl or her Mom. Oh well, we made the best of it. Snow White skipped daycare and we went straight home. Gymnast's Mom, Dawn called after talking over their weekend plans and Gymnast was free to play at our house Saturday! I had completely forgotten about the holiday weekend. We plan for Saturday around 11 AM for the girls to play for a few hours. You never
know with children if they will get along one on one like a house on fire or if they will each count the minutes until it is over. We agree to play it by ear.

Grammy K calls Thursday night to say she would also like to visit Saturday morning. I let her know Snow White is having a friend over that afternoon but we would LOVE to see her too!!! Really, it has been months since we saw Grammy K.

I went home and relaxed until Friday after work. I came home and cleaned like there was no tomorrow. ManSon was off in another state having his birthday party. [mommy whimper] He is all grown up now. The back lawn needed a good mowing and it was last minute so I mowed the lawn. I figured it was great exercise for myself and it was. Yikes! The back lawn has become a bit over grown but I do get it done and with a push mower too. [gas powered]. I found buried treasure in my lawn...will tell more later.

WANT A GREAT BAG?

Tomorrow is Friday. Do you know what you really need for tomorrow? A Brand New Hand Bag!! No, not just any hand bag a Dooney Bourke bucket bag. It’s it cute?! Don’t you just want to take it home with you? You also get a bottle of Victoria Secrets perfume.



So take a minute to visit Pinks & Blues to and enter her contest. Hurry, contest ends tomorrow! Yeah, I am late getting the info myself. Serves me right for not reading her blog last Friday. Yes, I know. I am crazy about pictures. Nearly every post I have in my blog has a picture but you should see her pictures. Love ‘em! Also check out her hilarious post about her husband. Do you have anyone in your family or one of your friends who is hoping to make it in your next posting in your blog?

Ok I have to run. You are relieved right? No super duper long post to read this time. (I See You. Really cute happy dance.)

A Soldier Returns Home From War

Shhhh…

You would think my posting this was a result of this past weekend, Memorial Day weekend. In actuality it was a very brief argument between my eldest (ManSon) and my youngest (Snow White) regarding what most would deem a small noise. The need to know of what made any noise in the house.

ManSon: “What is that noise? Snow White are you wearing your shoes in the house?”

Snow White: [shouts from another room] “No, I have just my socks on. ”

It was then I realized why ManSon is so sensitive to the noises in the house. It is the same reason I am sensitive to noises in the house. Simple explanation, my father served in the Vietnam War. Long, explanation below…

I was very little when my father went off to Vietnam with the US Navy as a Radar man. Sorry, I do not know what his rank was at the time or the proper name of his “job title” MOS?

The need for quiet. My Mother needed quite in the house after dinner to listen to the news and then to loose her reality in off the wall shows like Twilit Zone afterwards. When Dad home he need the quiet to distinguish the noises he heard as friend or foe. Simple little clackers (metal fish or other shape pinched together to make a clicking or metal snap noise) were forbidden at our house. I found out how intolerable they were for him after my elementary end of year fair. The clackers were given out as a prize for one of the games. So many children here and there all clicking, clacking, and snapping those metal toys sent my Dad home in a hurry. Apparently, a device similar to this toy was used by the soldiers to communicate to each other but not alert the foe who maybe near by.

I remember in the summer of 1975, my Mother screaming at my Dad when he would swerve around a soda can or any object (big or small) on the road. His focus was on that object and not the domestic road ways and surrounding object (other cars, buildings, ditches, etc). He had to avoid that can/object at all costs. When we were all clam after a scary swerve Mom explained why Dad was so “afraid” of the “can“. In Vietnam a simple item in the roadway was always a potential bomb or detonator. It may not be something that explodes in the road way. It could be a wire or something that triggers an explosion in the huts or anything near

I remember when Dad was home Mom told us to be extra quiet. When he was sleeping she would have us play outside or at a friend’s house as much as possible. Keeping three children under the age of 6 years old and a baby quiet is a great feat to accomplish on a daily basis! This need for quiet around the house at my very young age was practiced all through my adolescence. It was still present when I was a teenager. When I was out on my own in my 20s I remembered the rules of quiet in the house. When I became a Mother myself the rules of quiet became unconscious but evident today when ManSon was annoyed by the noise of Snow White running through the house.

Same song different day

Again I ask, what is with the price of gas jumping and jumping all the time. It recently did a 4 cent jump ($2.95 to $2.99) and today a 10 cent jump ($3.09 from yesterday ($2.99).

Should we start a poll on when it will jump a full dollar from one day to the next?

School Rules...

Sunscreen At School

My daughter, Snow White, is extremely fare skinned. When winter was over I sent her to school with spray on sunscreen SPF 45. The teacher told her she was not allowed to use that during school. They have two recesses and out door gym class. Snow White came home and was totally PINK. I planned to call the school the next morning and complain but the teacher called to ask if I had seen Snow White’s spelling book. I told her it was in the back pack with the sunscreen. She thought sunscreen was along the lines of medication and did not want to get into trouble so she did tell Snow White it was not allowed in school. I calmly explained Snow White’s fare skin and I was not pleased with her coming home with pink skin. The teacher said “Oh, I thought that happened over the weekend.” No, it did not happen over the weekend. I know my child cannot sit in the car next to the window in the summer time without sunscreen. Just a five minute drive to the grocery store and she will get pink on that side of her body.

The next day I called the principal who informed me they have no rules or guidelines regarding sunscreen. He advised me to have Snow White put it on herself or have the Nurse assist her but under no circumstances will a teacher or other factuality member rub lotion on my child. I can completely understand their no touching rule, that is why I bought spray on lotion. Snow White also has to wear a hat during gym and recess since she can also get sunburn on her scalp. The other kids think it is cool that she is the only one allowed to wear a hat at school.

We are not alone. Ana at Silicone Valley Moms had the same experience. She did a bit of research and found out there was a bill or law which allows children to wear sunscreen and protective clothing at school. And here How to Be a Bongga Mom: Sun Safety Starts Here Go check out her blog and the comments.

No Sandals At School Rule



I did a search on the no sandals rule which seems to be a country wide. I have only found the rule on private school websites. No public schools are coming up in my search. I admit after the first 5 pages of the search results I gave up. Most of the rules I found for the private schools regarding sandals was started on or before the year 2001. I have an 18 year old, 17 year old and an 8 year old. What happened in the private schools prior to 2001 that prompted them to incorporate this rule in their dress code? Why are the public schools in this area starting this new rule years later?

Suburban Bliss tells of an accident involving a little girl and sandals at her daughter’s school. Read her blog and the comments too.

No touching eliminates playing tag. When Snow White started Kindergarten she was reprimanded three times in one day for the same issue. “But I wasn’t touching her, I was hugging her!” Yeah, we are a very huggy family.

Gas Prices Go Up Again…



On my way to drop Snow White off at daycare I suddenly started screaming BUGGERY! BUGGERY! BUGGERY!

Snow White must have thought oh my goodness, Mommy has turrets! No, nothing like that. We just passed a gas station and the price of gas just jumped 4 cents per gallon from yesterdays price of $2.95. The price of Regular Unleaded Gas is now $2.99. Yes, I can afford to pay for my gas, I am not exactly strapped for cash but come on! Why does the price continue to increase with absolutely no explanation?! I can understand crude oil prices fluctuate but that means they go up and down. The price of gas has only gone up.

I calmed down before we reached the daycare. On my way to work I found one gas station still at the $2.95 price so I filled up my tank. My goodness last year I was excited about finding a gas station in D.C. with the price of $1.97. Here it is a year later and gas has gone up a full dollar. No reason, someone decided we will pay for it or else!

“Although some consumers might make the tough choice to cancel or revise travel plans, Illinoisans who rely on their cars to get to and from work have little choice but to pay the price, and feel the pain, each time they pull up to a gas pump.” Statement from the Office of the Illinois Attorney General

Does it make you nostalgic for the good ole days of 2005?



Ok my gas ranting is done for the day.
*******************************************
What is the price of gas in your area?

Does your school have the No Sandals Rule?

Is your child allowed to use sunscreen at school?

What part of the country/world do you live in?

Happy Mother's Day! & A Contest To Boot!

Mothers Day for me...

I slept in until 8 AM Woot!

Snow White had been bubbling with excitement since Friday. She could barely restrain herself from showing me her Mother's Day presents. Finally, Mother's Day was here! She bounced out of bed and sprung into action! I have never seen her produce her backpack with such speed! There were cards she made in school, in daycare and at home. The card she made in school was a cut out of a tea cup with a poem writen on the outside and a tea bag on the inside. The card from daycare had a coloring of a peachy flower in a pot "You wont kill this one mom." I loved this since Snow White hinted over and over again at the grocery store for me to give her just enough money to buy a potted flower. While in the store I said "The flowers are so beautiful here but what would happen if they came to live in our house?" Snow White sadly said "They would die and die again." A woman across the way from us laughed and laughed! She said "No worries dear, I am the same way." She smiled, hugged her tween son and went on to their shopping. Yes, I kill all house plants.

Snow White and I and I had a large breakfast of waffles, sausages, scrambled eggs and toast. She was so sweet and wanted to do everything herself including buttering the waffles and toast. She scrambled the eggs but I cooked them and the sausage. She had milk and I had my cup of tea. By the way that tea was the best I ever had and there was no name on the tea. After breakfast Snow White and I played a board game, Littlest Pet Shop, which was one of her birthday presents.

ManSon was fast asleep due to a long night of playing video games and watching TV with his friend. I checked in on them before Snow White, Pup and I went for a long walk. I did get a wonderful "Happy Mother's Day" wish. His friend was not so gracious when his mother called to say she would be over in a little while to pick him up. ManSon just rolled his eyes at him. I actually came right out and said "It is Mother's Day. Be nice."

I have driven up the main street in our neighborhood and even one or two side streets visiting Snow White's friends. I never took the time to really explore our new neighborhood. Today we were going to walk down several streets which we had no idea where they lead. It was a fun adventure. Our neighborhood seems to have some history still evident today. At one time this must have been farm land and then sold to individuals for the purpose of building houses or houses with smaller farms in the 1930s. The cute little cape cods which look so small on the outside but actually very large on the inside. I know this since we live in one. The distance between the 1930 houses and those which seem to have been built in the 1970s is a good distance but they are mingled in together. This lead me to belive in the small farming houses or maybe they were just extreamly large plots. Most of the 1970s houses are very plain in the exterior. Very flat front and pretty much looks like a rectangular box with a slight triangular top. There were a few, very few, with tall pillars attached to a porch roof but other than that they were very plain.

We had been walking for about an hour when I saw a park. I said to Snow White "Oh my! There is a park and it is so close to our house! (there is a shorter route from our house) The park had a full lit up basket ball court, a beautiful outdoor pit BBQ with a stone brick chimney and a cute half wall all around. There was even a large swimming pool with Spanish style iron works and beautiful brick half wall around three-quarters of it!

Oh, wait...that beautiful Spanish styling went all the way behind a five car garage and....a house. This was not a local park, it was someone's back yard! As we walked along I could see the front and side yards contained several breathtaking gardens. I am not talking about a typical garden you see in a neighbors yard. I mean when I walked towards the corner it was more like a rain forest and tropical garden all mixed in to one! When I saw the front of the house I could tell it was one of the 1930's houses originally a cape code but had Spanish details in great proportion.

They might have been the original land owners who sold off acreage to the rest of the neighboring houses or were the largest land purchasers in the area at that time. The house looked splendid on the outside. They had a local park as their back yard, the rest of their land was a combination of rainforests and tropical gardens and I can only imagine what the inside must look like. In this city I was amazed to see such a house. I hope on some small occasion I might have an invite to visit the inside of this beautiful gem.

We walked on a bit longer until Snow White said she was thirsty. That is when we headed back home. Other than that our day was pretty uneventful. Oldest Daughter called from Annapolis. She was out on Grandma Candy's Mini Yaht. She had attended a concert the night before as part of her birthday. I prefer her day is all about her, not Momma. We watched a movie, had lunch at home, called my Mother and ManSon's friend went home. I took a little nap and when I woke up it seemed like a new day so I cleaned house and did laundry. My Sister called while I was doing laundry and said "But it's Mother's Day! You should not be doing laundry." My response "The laundry needs to be done and guess what? I am the Mom."

Exiled in Toyland is having a contest! She is also having a baby Boy! Awww. Her contest is to come up with a blogger name for her baby boy. There is a prize but I did not take the time to read what it is. I was too excited about her new addition and thinking of names. She has a daughter known as ittybit and would like a name to go along with that but not seeming like an after thought. Think of how you refer to your children in a blog or an endearing nick name you call a friend's child then put that in a sentence like..."Ittybit and Hunk-a-doodle-baby-boy went to the grocery store with us" or "Ittybit and Hunk-a-doodle-baby-boy enjoyed the museum today." Then there is my favorite "The Great Adventures of Ittybit and Hunk-a-doodle-baby-boy!" Ok, Hunk-a-doodle-baby-boy will not be a name I am submitting. It is way too long to type over and over and over again for the long life of a blog and in an every day occurrence. You get the idea so please click the link and participate in the contest, just say hello or congratulations.

Exiled In Toyland: Happy Mother's Day! How about a contest?

Should a Mother Worry...

Today (written Monday, May 6th) when I picked up Snow White from daycare she had absorbed yet another "accent". She sounded like a "Valley Girl" from the 80s....e-x-a-c-t-ly So Totally Like them. It was only a five minute drive but I so TOTALLY um like, wanted to say uh, gag me with a spoon. Like um yeah. furrr real like. he, he, he. Yes, we live in a valley but my goodness, where does she pick this stuff up at? Daycare or school?

Her conversation was all about Justin Timberlake and how Totally Cool he is. "You know. Like. He was on the Nick Awards show and Totally Cool. He sings this song, um, I don't know all the words or the name of it but it so goes like um yeah like 'go get me go, go get me go'." {later found out the song is called Sexy Back she heard it on the school bus} I told her I believe he was married to Britney Spears but she was very admit that he was not only not married but he was a teenager who is not old enough to be married. I told her he and Britney have a baby son. Her voice grew louder in her admit position that he was not old enough to be married so he could so not possibly have a baby.

I assured her that he is around 24 yrs old. She said there is NO way he could be that old! I explained that Mommy is almost 40 so that would be about half my age and that is not all that old. It was only then she easily accepted 24 as not that old.

I also told her Justin use to compete in pageants! Yes, he actually competed in pageants when he was a young boy. She wanted proof. As soon as we were home I pulled out a VSH video tape with him doing Sportswear, Beauty/formal wear and casualwear. He was a ham back then and still rocking the stage. I had to rewind the tape twice before she really believed. He introduced himself and everything. She was satisfied and cannot wait to tell her big brother that Justin Timberlake also was a pageant boy!

Now proving that he and Britney were married and have a baby boy is not an easy task. I do not subscribe to tabloids so the only "proof" I have is from the Internet and Snow White has a definite view of on line information..."You know the Internet LIES! Anyone can say something on the Internet but that doesn't make it true." I have seen some crazy things posted on the Internet and some as opinions. I cannot say her theory is 100% wrong.

ManSon left with his friends during the Birthday party last Friday and said he would be back Sunday. Sunday night came and he called me to explain his friend was driving down a gravel road, they did not see the pipe sticking up in the road and the friend drove over it. Luckily, this only punctured one tire. His friend is awaiting payday to pay for a new tire. This means ManSon would be home in a few days. I told him to call me tomorrow just to check in and he said he would. As always at the end of any phone conversation with my children I say "I love you." ManSon is almost 19 years old (birthday in about 2 wks) and since he was officially a teenager his usual response is "ok" or "yeah." There have been a few times when he said "Me too" or actually uttered the words "I love you too Mom" but that usually involved my being away for a few months due to work and only with our immediate family present on his end. This time he was at his friend's house using his friend's cell phone. His cell phone died due to not bringing the charger with him since he was only planning to be gone until Sunday. He actually said "I love you too" while using his friend's phone and in front of his friends! I was so thrilled it almost brought me to tears.

Tuesday night during a daily call with my sister I mentioned this and her response was "Oh my gosh! Is he okay?! Do you think he is doing drugs or wanting to commit suicide?" WHAT?! Those thoughts never came in to my mind! Now I was worried.

I tried to call ManSon but his cell phone died due to not bringing the charger since he only planned to be away for two days. Oldest Daughter gives me the phone number of another friend to elevate my worry. ManSon is fine. He laughed and laughed at Auntie's (my sister) reaction. He also swore never to say it again unless 1. I am dying 2. He is home and staying or 3. In front of Auntie just to watch her freak out in person.

My Mom, Grandma, tells me she has been diagnosed with glaucoma. We had a phone call with Grammy K she tells me she has to have a hip replacement. Grammy K will see her Dr tomorrow and Grandma will see her Dr on Monday. Grandma also has an appointment with a glaucoma expert tomorrow. She said if I hear back from ManSon she and Grandpa will pick him up and bring him home.

So there is my list of worries and they all came in one days time. I know, count myself lucky this was all I had to worry about. I do.

Wooo!!

Have you ever watched a commercial and found it funny…Every time? I cannot help but laugh everytime this woman says “Wooo!” I laugh, not just a little bit but very loudly! As if I had seen it for the very first time. Very entertaining but I had no idea what product they were selling. When I asked my sister about the commercial she also said she cannot help but laugh. We love it and thought maybe it was a McDonald’s salad commercial. When I looked it up on YouTube I found out it is actually Hillshire Farms. I would have never guessed.

Hillshire Entrée Salad there Meatie Wooo!


WOOO!

Other Hillshire Farm Commercials I found on YouTube but have not actually seen on TV. (I do not watch much TV)

Hillshire Entrée Salad New at Office




Hillshire Lunch meat

Slumber Party ....3rd part and still goes on

On to the Fashion show! Drama came up to me and asked if it would be ok to put make up on the girls. I said it was ok since they could wash their faces before they go to sleep. To my surprise, out of her over night bag she produced a complete line of cosmetics. I am not talking about clear lip gloss and powder. I mean several shades of eye shadow, blush, lipstick, mascara, the works. I was amazed at how well Drama applied the makeup to each and every girl! (except for Snow White who declined the offer) I tell you no lie I was impressed! She was an expert with a makeup brush. I did not know how to apply make up until I was 16 and believe you me Drama at the tender age of 8 did a far better job than I did at 16.

I brought out the boxes of dance costumes and showed the girls Snow White’s dress up closet. They could pick out whatever outfit they wanted! Snow White is a bit smaller than her friends so an outfit may look alright on Snow White but a bit smaller…uh shorter on them. Then there was a request for shoes so we pulled out all of Snow White’s shoes, even the shoes she had not worn yet. To my surprise many of the shoes no longer fit Snow White but they fit TV Star. I told her she could take home all the shoes that fit her. Unfortunately there were two girls who could not fit into Snow White’s shoes so out came Mommy’s flats which barely fit them (Yes, I have small feet size 5). Sorry, I was not going to risk one of them missing gymnastics due to twisting an ankle in my heels. I was instructed to wait in the sunroom for the show to start. Having forgotten to charge the video camera or check the status of the disk for the digital camera I was left with a disposable camera.

Drama came out wearing a beautiful blue dress with some sparkle to it. She announced the show was about to start and lined up the girls in the kitchen. Drama was the MC saying things like “Here is our fabulous kitty. Watch her do the cat walk in style” Come on girls strut like you mean it!” Each girl was given 1 ½ minutes “on stage” to model and strike their poses. They were dressed up as ballerinas, gymnasts, cheerleaders, Disney characters, Tea Party Ladies, Dorothy, school teacher, and others that I cannot remember off hand. Pup was also in the fashion show wearing one of his shirts and often uses as an accessory by several of the girls. One of the girls struck several poses of fierce kitty, nose crinkled up, lips pursed and an “I’m going to get you” look on her face, hands clawing at the air and I was a bit scared. I so did not see that coming from this sweet shy little girl. Did I mention I was scared?

About half way through the “Fashion Show” some of the girls gleefully shouted out which outfit they wanted to wear next. Um Next? I thought this was something we would only run through once. Apparently we were not all on the same page. The rest of the girls heard this and even though standing in line for their first turn some started yelling “I calling _____ outfit!” You know sort of “calling it” like we use to when we were kids “I call shot gun”. or “I call the window seat!”

Halfway through the second stage walk I ran out of film but that did not stop them, they continued for another hour changing and striking poses. Oh well that kept them entertained while I readied the next craft. To my surprise they were not ready for another craft nor did they want to help put the outfits back. The outfits were left out “In case we want to do it again in a few minutes.” That was fine with me.

Since they were not ready to do another craft we decided it was movie time! Snow White wanted to watch TV Star on TV. I spoke with TV Star’s mother earlier in the day. She saw the clips of her daughter when it was on but TV Star had not yet seen herself on the TV show. This was exciting! Everyone rushed to the family room screaming with excitement! It took us awhile to get to the part with TV Star but it was so worth the look on all their faces! All the girls jumped up and down yelling “There she is!! There she is!! That’s you! It’s really you!”

What was the TV Show? It was VH-1’s Little Beauties. Yes, a pageant documentary. Drama and Gymnast made several comments such as “Pageant girls are so fake! How can anyone be real when they have to be so fake with all that make up and stuff. It’s a real shame they make those girls do pageants.” Everyone is entitled to their own opinion and I am not about to sway them in to thinking otherwise. TV Star, Cheer Girl and Snow White all heard the comments but it didn’t bother them in the least. If that is what their parents are teaching them then so be it. Never mess with the values and opinions children have learned from their parents, so long as it is not harmful to others.

Drama mentioned the girls teeth looked a bit “different, sort of too perfect.” Snow White ran upstairs and came back smiling to show off her “fake teeth.” Snow White and her friends giggled themselves silly and ended up in giggling pile on the floor. I love that she has such a good sense of humor. While watching the documentary Drama and Gymnast both mentioned a few more times their disdain for pageants.



The girls looked over Snow White’s collection of crowns and asked her questions about what she does at a pageant. With all the questions and such I thought maybe they would like to watch a pageant DVD with Snow White as one of the contestants. She picked out the Glamour Girls DVD which with all the girls lining up across the stage for “Beauty Line up.” Immediately the girls start asking which one is Snow White. I tell them “You point her out when you see her come on to the stage.” I had to laugh as they pointed out just about every blonde that walked on to the stage. Their thinking was pageants are so fake that Snow White’s hair would have been changed from ebony black to sunny blonde! Most of the girls in the group wore glitz dresses and were indeed blonde. Snow White wore a flower girl dress as did just a few others and there were one or two other brunettes in her group. The girls finally picked out Snow White when the camera did a close up of the girls faces. As we watched Snow White do her beauty walk, the girls were glued to the TV and chattered with excitement. I really did not wish to watch the whole DVD so after the beauty walk we went on to the next activity.

Although Drama and Gymnast had a few negative things to say about pageants they were excited to see the documentary and the pageant DVD. They also said they watch Top Model religiously with their Moms and have “definite plans” to try out for Top Model next year. I said nothing but I am sure their parents will let them know Top Model is for adults not 8 year olds. I did watch an episode of Austraila’s Top Model and I was shocked that this is what the girls wanted. Grown women crying, dressing up in skimpy, sexy underwear and bearing most of their body in the rest of the outfits. Again, I do not think it is right for me to interject my opinion when they are following their mothers. After all, it is only a TV show right?

Make-your-own-sundae was a big hit with most of the girls but one. Sweetie would much rather have apples and peanut butter. Remember, I said before her parents have taught her well. She did not request the different desert out of robotic regard to her parents. You could tell she genuinely wanted the apples and peanut butter. I immediately went on to cutting up one of the apples while the rest of the girls attempted to top each other by seeing who could manage the most toppings on their ice cream cups without too much spill over. Sweetie stood right next to me monitoring every move of the knife against the apple. She thanked me profusely for taking the time to make her special snack. She really appreciated this simple task. I assured her it was no trouble at all.

After the girls finished their sundaes we started on the bird houses. The girls painted their bird houses and decorated them with flowers, fake birds and other craft what-nots. The bird houses turned out beautiful! I told the girls they could either keep the bird houses for themselves or give them to their mothers on Mother’s Day. I had many different tubes of paint but only one tube of each color. The girls were showing evidence that they were indeed getting sleepy. There were a few mean comments which I quickly put an end to. One girl actually said to Snow White “Just because it is your birthday does not mean you get to be treated more special than me. I am your guest so you just sit there and wait.” This was in response to Snow White asking to put a dollop of paint on her paper plate. The girl was not using the paint at the time but planned to use it next. All the girls are very sweet, it was the late hour that brought out the few grouchy comments.

When they finished their bird houses a few said they were ready to sleep. I thought that would be a GREAT idea! It was midnight and they had accomplished their goal to stay up all night. I was surprised we did not have enough time to do all of the activities and games. Oh well, we all had a great time and no one was standing around bored. Did I mention it was only a FEW girls who said they were tired? Sweetie was getting a little upset saying over and over again that her parents would be upset if they knew she staid up late. I assured her they know she is at a slumber party and most girls stay up until midnight at slumber parties. Now about half of the girls were making their way to their sleeping bags. The other half wanted to do more crafts so I put out the Barbie sunglass kits and they started on them. What could go wrong ? Half wanted to sleep and the other half were quietly doing another activity in another room. It turns out each and every girl has a different “thing” they do that helps them fall asleep. A few need the light on to sleep and the rest cannot sleep with the light on. Others need a TV, radio or fan on. I was not about to lug a TV into the room so the girls settled for a radio and small isolating fan. I turned off the lights in the room but left the light in the bathroom on and the door cracked enough to spread a little light at one end of the room. The girls who did not want the light on moved their sleeping bags to the other end of the room. Snow White finished her Barbie sunglasses and headed for her sleeping bag. She sleeps with the lights off, a sleep mask on, needs no noise or other special things to fall asleep. At this point she was so tired she would have slept through glairing stadium lights and a big brass band playing right next to her sleeping bag. She and three other girls were out in a matter of minutes.

There were four girls who got their second wind. They were awake and ready to move on to the next activity…making sleep masks and crowns for their dolls and then decorating them. Around 2:30 AM they finished this activity and wanted to play dress up again. I noticed I was getting a bit grouchy so before I said anything, and I mean anything, I said it to myself about 5 or 6 times first. When they ran to Snow White’s room to dress up I told them I would be down stairs watching TV and that is what I did. I watched TV until 4:30 AM. Since I no longer her the pitter patter of their feet running across the hardwood floors I went to check on them, they were fast asleep in Snow White’s room. Finally, relief had come and I could sleep.

I want you to know it is not my intention to make you read so much. I just want to remember all of this some day. Also this was written 5/10/07 and regular unleaded gas was $2.89 that morning and by lunch time it was $2.95 and premium was $3.25.

Let’s Get This Party Started...(song by Pink playing on my mental juke box)

Before TV Star arrived the girls were too excited and played outside for a good while. This was not something I anticipated but it worked out well. After awhile Snow White gave them the grand tour of the house. I then served Pizza, fruit and veggies to start them off. Then it was on to the first craft, putting their names on their foam crowns and decorating them. This took awhile since we had to search and search for the right letters for each of their names. Snow White gave up looking for her letters and opted for just her first initial so she could help her guests search for their letters. When they were finished the girls pranced around the house wearing their crowns and introducing their dollies and stuffed animals to each other.

A little while later there was a knock on the door. TV Star had arrived! Her Aunt explained she was a little worried that everyone had started without her and all the games, crafts, cake were all done. I assured her we only completed one craft and were putting off the cake until she arrived. The girls were so full on the pizza and snacks they were not nearly ready for cake.

We all pitched in to find the letters for TV Star’s crown and the girls were anxious to start the next craft. I passed out the packages for the American Girl doll sleeping bags. Gymnast proudly exclaimed she knew exactly how to do this craft since she and her mother did a similar craft together. I was delighted to hear someone else at the party could assist with this craft. This seemed to be a very simple activity, two pieces of cloth with “fringe” cuts on three sides of the rectangular shaped clothes. All we had to do was knot two strips of fringe together until all were eventually knotted. To my great surprise Snow White, Gymnast and myself were the only people at this party who could tie a knot. How can it be that 8 year old girls do not know how to tie a knot? Don't they all know how to tie their shoes. Oh, wait a minute, Snow White refuses to wear tie-shoes because she does not want to learn the loops portion. As her mother I do give in and buy her shoes which require no tying. Partially due to her lack of wanting and part due to my "Let's hurry out of the house in the morning." Girls started pleading for us (Gymnast, Snow White and myself) to make their sleeping bags. Snow White said her fingers were getting tired from all the tying so she gave her lot to me as well. Gymnast was the only girl to actually finish her own sleeping bag. I told her how proud I was of her. Of course I did this out of ear shot of the other girls. I don't want to hurt their feelings while making note of one girls accomplishment.

Since I was going to be busy tying knots I had to move to the next craft to keep the girls busy. Out came the bird houses and paint. They happily painted their bird houses and decorated them with fake birds, flowers and glitter glue. I was impressed with their individuality and creativity. Unfortunately when they were all finished I was still working on the dolly sleeping bags. They wanted to play flashlight tag so we found a flashlight and off they went in to the back yard once again. I sat in the sunroom which is set up high above the yard and I could see everything. They giggled, laughed and chased each other with Pup right there with them.

As I finished the last of the sleeping bags we decided to play a simple game. I gathered the girls in to a circle in the living room. The simple instructions were given…put your slippers or shoes in a pile at the center of your circle. Next, show them the prize for this game and explain the first to get her own shoes on wins! WAIT! Wait a minute! Wait until I say go! ha, ha, ha. They put the shoes and slippers back in to a pile and each had their eyes fixed on their own. GO!

One girl had her toes in both of her sneakers and exclaimed "I WIN! I WIN!" I laughed and said “They have to be all the way on.” In the end we had a tie between Sweetie and TV Star so I gave TV Star the Strawberry Short Cake bath set that was on display for the prize and told Sweetie to pick a prize out of the super large princess bag. She picked a plush dolly with bath accessories. (I found out later she gave her prize to another girl saying she had too many stuffed toys...again showing how very sweet Sweetie is) The other girls moaned a bit so I assured them everyone would win something tonight. If by any chance at the end of the party someone did not win a game they would be allowed to pick a prize from the bag.

ManSon called to say an out of state friend called and would like my permission to kidnap him and bring him to his house for the weekend. I gave permission for the out of town visit. ManSon came home to pick up a few things. He burst through the front door, swept Snow White up and swung her around as he said "Happy Birthday Snow White!!" He carried her over to the dinning room window and said "Wave. Those are my friends out there." The car full of friends waved back while shouting "Happy Birthday Snow White!" ManSon stopped to talk to the little girls, give them advice on how to be good and even let them see his electric guitar. He gives her a hug and again wishes her a happy birthday. Snow White was thrilled that her super cool big brother made an appearance so her friends would see that she comes from coolness. "See, he really is super cool!" He really is a great big brother, always bestowing his wisdom on her that coolness means being yourself and not putting up with all the "bad" people. I am so glad my older children are such a good influence on my youngest. Yes, I am bragging and I have very good reason to brag. My children are not perfect nor am I but it really swells my heart to think of the times they really shine.

This party aint over yet (did I spell that right? I have never written that word before, oh well). I will have more later. Snow White is home sick so I posted what I wrote up yesterday.