She bought her house based on the yard was perfect for Bear. She redecorated the inside of the house to suit his needs and likes. Her car is also a result of what Bear needs. She took accelerated college courses in order to allow her to graduate with her masters degree in a short amount of time just so she would have more time to spend with Bear. Her life revolves around her baby Bear and cancer will soon take him away.
He was scheduled to have knee surgery the day before Thanksgiving (re-scheduled from this past Saturday). She received a call at work from telling her due to finding cancer the surgery would not take place. They explained he only has a short time to live and the surgery would only worsen the cancer. She was caught completely off guard due to the previous diagnosis and non cancer related surgery. Imagine receiving a call from your doctor telling you, your 11 yr old child has only two months to live.
She called me at work because she was upset, distraught and on her way to pick him up. In between her sobs, crying and screaming I finally understood what she was telling me. I ran out of the office crying but trying to stay calm since I was still on the phone with her.
My first feeling was unbelief then grief which turned in to anger. I cannot believe they told her this devastating news over the phone and then told her to come pick him up!! I know I would be in no shape to breath let alone drive if I had a similar call about one of my children.
I wanted to yell and scream but not at her so I just staid on the line listening to her cry and let it all out until she reached the veterinarian hospital.
She talked with the vet and waited while they processed the paper work to release him. During this time several of the employees came up to her and offered their condolences which only made her cry more when she was trying so hard to compose herself.
I started thinking of how I could rearrange Thanksgiving, make travel arrangements to be with her on Thanksgiving. "Everybody listen up, a Thanksgiving feast is in the fridge call me if you need instructions on how to prepare the meal. Look after my children. I will be back Sunday night." Some how that seemed the wrong thing to do but I so wanted to just get on the first flight out or even drive down there to give her the comfort she so needed.
My sister and I had many long phone conversations during the rest of the day and most of the night. She cried some of the time but not all of the time. She was trying to get a grasp on what to do. She wanted so much to hold and cuddle her Bear but he was completely unaware what was going on. Bear was still medicated when she brought him home. He wanted to do what he normally does around the house but was a bit woozy.
Around midnight he was finally thinking about falling asleep and she was so afraid of "What if he doesn't wake up in the morning?" My feeling was he just has to wake up in the morning, because it is Thanksgiving for goodness sakes. He has to stay with her until after they go home from Christmas visit at least. When he passes it should be in his sleep, at their home and only when she is there with him.
This may seem like a big too do over a pet to some people but those "some people" do not know the history of this oh so loved Bear. They have not had him in their lives for 11 years. He has been there at the beginning and the end of every day for her. Through her divorce, good days and bad days at the office, and when she just misses the rest of her family. The days she is feeling not so great to the days she is on top of the world. All of that is going to change and she is trying to come to terms with it.
It is devastating for her to finally have everything so close to the way she wanted for them and now her time with him is so short. Another reminder that life is too short.