Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Have Bees On Your Underwear?

While cleaning up and reorganizing Snow White’s room this past weekend we came across an unidentified dolly (UD). I like to keep things neat by having everything in its proper place. All Kelly, Barbie, Bratz, Polly Pockets, fairies on their shelves, play sets on closet shelves and all their tiny accessories in the appropriate dolly drawer in the closet. American Girl Kirsten and her belongings in her trunk. AG Bitty Baby in either her high chair, crib or cradle. All other miscellaneous toys go in the large princess toy box in the closet.

If everything is in its proper place I don’t have to hear “Mom where did you put my ____ doll?” As if I skipped work that day, ran home to play with her ___ doll and either hid it from her or did not put it back where it belongs. Sure, that's what happened.

Anyway, we came across this one dolly who did no seem to go with any of the groups. It looks like a Bratz doll but her feet do not come off (Bratz doll trait). We put UD aside and continue to put all the other toys in their proper places. Afterwards we still do not know what to do with UD. Suddenly it dawns on me! This is that new Barbie, My Scene Barbie, I saw on Project Runway’s last episode. I tell Snow White to put her on the shelf with the other Barbies but she protests. “No way is this a Barbie. She does not belong with the others.”

We go back and forth debating why she is or is not a Barbie. Then Snow White comes up with an idea…”Mom there is only one sure way to tell if it is a Barbie…we have to check her underwear for bees.” I burst into laughter to the point of crying. “Mom, you know what I meant. The letter “B”… on her underwear.”

Well, someone had to do it. Snow White was not going to do it. It had to be done to finish up my “everything in it’s proper place” clean up. So, I looked. Guess what? No Bs on her underwear. I did recall a similar, simulated underwear on another Barbie I was asked to dress earlier that day. I tried and tried to convince Snow White that UD was really a Barbie but she was insistent this was not the case. Did I ever mention that Snow White has over 50 Barbies?

Do you know what we had to do for the next half hour? Yes, we had to check the underwear of the Barbie multitude until we found at least three with the same matching underwear. We discovered the older Barbies from 1950s-1960s did not have underwear, simulated or otherwise. Some of the Barbies from the 1970-1980s had simulated underwear with the Barbie Bs. The newer Barbies have nude/skin tone underwear with tiny bumps all over but no Bs.

With that grueling chore accomplished I again told Snow White to put UD A.K.A My Scene Barbie on one of the Barbie Shelves. She looked at UD, then at her shelves of Barbies but still refused.

Snow White: “She just doesn’t belong. She cannot sit there with the rest of them and look so …off.”

Me: “Ok, fine, put her on the Bratz shelf then. She looks more like them anyway.”

Snow White: “Sorry, I cannot do that either. She doesn’t belong with them. She isn’t a Bratz doll. It wouldn’t be right to put her there.” She chucked UD/MSB in the toy box with all the other miscellaneous toys.

Wow Barbie jilted by her own kind and the other “popular girlz” to boot! I never thought I would see the day.

I actually felt a twinge in my heart when UD was flung in to the toy box. No, I don’t really care that deeply for Barbies and such. It bothered me to hear my own daughter say that due to UD being different from the other Barbies she could not sit with them. This gave me the opportunity to sit down and discuss why being different can be ok.

On a funny note, Grandpa called while we were attempting to find UD’s ID.

Grandpa: “What are up to today?”
Me: “Checking Barbie Butts for Bees.”
Grandpa: [while choking and laughing] “What was that you said?”

I explained and Grandpa is ok.

The Untold Story of Barbie? Click here

More Barbie/Bratz chatter Suburban Turmoil: Bratzism

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